Who reads? Like really reads? Buys books from Barnes and Noble or downloads them to your Kindle or other E-readers? What kind of books do you enjoy? Mysteries? Drama? What? Have you noticed that sex is the center of this generation? How many people will you actually capture if there is no sex or intimacy in the story? There always has to be a scene about penetration, seduction, affairs, or kisses that creates a craving for more. While that all seems highly enticing, there is more to literature. This all seems quite contradicting because I do love a good romance novel and romance novels are what I write, BUT, (big but here) there is so much more to a story, to a relationship. I love a happy ending. I love relationships that keep going…that happily ever after. But from what we see in most novels, sex dictates most of those emotions. Funny thing is, it’s not just in stories…this ish is real life!  I know ya’ll have heard of the “90 day rule.” We’ve seen it on Steve Harvey’s Think Like a Man. How many have actually tried that 90 day rule. Hell I’ll even challenge some of ya’ll 30 days to hold that cookie. We stay doing these 30 day ab and butt challenges trying to get our bodies right for “zaddy” but little do you know, Zaddy don’t want your ass long-term, you giving him the milk for free.  There’s so much feeling attached to sex that sometimes we feel like we know a person when all you’re getting is a little bit of knowing and a lot of emotion. You catching my drift yet? Your partner might not want kids. Your partner may not want more for themselves or you might not even be in his futureee!!! Your partner might have a whole newborn baby on the way that he didn’t tell you nothing about!! (It happens.) But all you know about him is that he talks sweet, gets your nails done, texts you back fast, and puts it DOWN in the bed. Hayyyee!!! NO! NOT HAAYYEE! Because then you’re going to be sitting stupid with mixed emotions and a pocket full of hurt and a smashed cookie. (Idk.) Shoot, I’m going to be real with you. I was that girl sitting stupid. I was naïve to guy’s intentions. Hell! We all were at one point. But when is the point where you say enough is enough?  Take sex out of the equation and lock that cookie up. Open your mouth and speak to your partner. Ask questions! Talk about you (not too much, mouthy!!) Talk about them and pray they aren’t cocky. Just chill and see what unravels. When you take sex out, your emotions are clear and focused and not clouded with euphoria. Lock it up boo! Wear your granny panties on dates. Oh? Ya’ll don’t go on dates? Ya’ll just sit in the house? (*sips tea) Know your worth and boss up! No matter if you have kids already, just finished school, have a great job, just moving into your new place, got the keys to your new car, whatever, don’t ever stop your life or confuse yourself over a man that’s not serious about you.